Taking Care

Lately, I have been feeling a bit burnt out. It is not that I have more than the normal activities and responsibilities scheduled or any huge project to complete. Rather, the steady stream of sickness (traveling around the family) company, and the regular day to day stress that seems to be wearing me down.

Yesterday afternoon I literally was so exhausted, mentally and physically, that I fell asleep while reading my daughter stories at rest time. She proceeded to get up, use the bathroom and go downstairs to play. Luckily my husband was working from home that afternoon and the baby was napping. Thankfully he took her on some errands with him and left me undisturbed. I slept for an hour and a half and it was pure bliss! Of course I awoke with a start and jumped up, wondering where the children were. After realizing that my husband had every thing taken care of and had let me sleep, I was singing his praises. What a great guy! I guess he saw I was exhausted too.

This was the first time I have ever fallen asleep when watching my kids, and I admit it was a bit scary. Was I getting sick (I did have a headache and after checking, a slight fever) or truly that tired?? I went to bed at 8:00 that night still feeling bone-tired, but did not sleep well.

Reflecting upon yesterday's events I realized that I had not eaten lunch or dinner, just an apple on the run. I also thought hard and could not remember if I had more than one glass of water to drink, had sat down for more than 2 minutes without holding a child, or even taken a trip to the restroom. WHOA! Wait a minute, there is no way I was really that busy all day.... is there? No.

The startling truth suddenly hit me, I had actually forgotten to take care of myself in any way...even my own basic needs, because I was so busy with everyone else. Has anyone else every been guilty of this? My mind was running on overdrive thinking about future plans, solutions to some current stressors and of course the kids. So the true reason for my recent burn out and exhaustion was revealed. I have actually been neglecting my own needs. Not wants, needs. Needs for good rest, good nutrition and even more importantly good time in the word and prayer. (More than the 10 minutes I get in the morning, on a good day!)

I am not trying to be a martyr for my family. I just got so caught up in other things. To be honest I think I also place a much lower value on my happiness, health and comfort than that of anyone else. That is definitely not being a good steward of the life God has given me. So I am turning over a new leaf. From now on, I will include myself on the list of people whose welfare, health and happiness I care for every day!!

Baby Talk

Never have I imagined I'd be married and become a mother of 4 kids. I've always been driven by music, ambitions, and the plans I've mapped out to accomplish my goals. I knew exactly what I wanted by the time I turned 30 and marriage plus kids would come after I turn that very age. I can't believe I'm turning 30 next month and my life is no way close to what I thought it would be.

I was quite nervous about having a fourth child but I love every minute of it. Sure, it takes hard work and many sleepless nights but being a mother is one of the greatest gift I've received from God. Maybe it's because both Jay and I grew up as an only child, but having a big family is great! I love watching my kids interacting with one another. They have so much fun together.

Morgan is two weeks old already. I can't believe how fast the days go by. Considering how tough this pregnancy was on my body, I'm so glad feel great now. I know I need to take things slow for another 2 weeks, but I'm so tempted to get back to the list of things-to-do. My house looks like a train wreck and being OCD and a perfectionist, it's driving me up the wall. Hopefully, I will catch up with everything.... soon. I need some sleep.

Signs of Spring

We've had a time of discipline in our house. My teenage son fell asleep watching a movie at friends house and missed an already extended curfew--by hours. We'd already had several sketchy --REALLY approximate return times over the past couple weeks, and this was the event that tipped the scale. One of the hard things for me as a mom over the years, has been to discipline my children when they've done something wrong, when I understand why or how it happened. It's hard when I could see myself making the same mistake. Another example of this is when a child reacts in anger and does something wrong, against a sibling who's done them wrong, and now you have an angry hurt child, who is in line for discipline--both of them are sometimes.

When you love your kids, it can be hard sometimes to follow through and deliver on the consequences you have already agreed on. In fact, I have found myself really rearranging the facts subconsciously to avoid the drama that WILL unfold if I follow through.

We're at the end of a two week 'grounding' period. It's been so nice to not have to worry or wait up at night. But mostly, it's been a time of settling for us. Both for me as a mom and for my son. We are talking more, seeing each other more and have had moments of relaxed enjoyable relating. What I'm seeing is the fruit of discipline. There's a beautiful thing that emerges from the soil of being grounded or submitting to a consequence. When discipline is dispensed in love-but with certainty and firmness, eventually you see signs of life and hope. But you have to have faith because all you see for a long while is dirt, and more dirt and maybe mud, rain and snow on top!

Hang in there moms. We have an awesome opportunity to raise the next generation of men and women for the kingdom of God. Spring will come.
"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Hebrews 12:11

Week 2: Sleepless in Long Island

Morgan is finally home after spending a week in the NICU. I'm so thankful that everything is okay and she's healthy and thriving.

Now all we have to do is work on the routine and somehow get her to sleep through the night on her own for the next few months. I'm like a walking zombie, not knowing what day it is and my head is clouded with haziness. I nursed three of my kids on demand until they were a year and few months. But with Morgan, I am determined to "babywise" her (parent-directed feeding) but am having a hard time doing so. I have read this book 5 times already. I have all the information in my head, but to act upon it is another story.

How do you teach your baby to sleep without depending on you? Do you have any advice?

A Mother's Golden Rules

I came across this list entitled A Mother's Golden Rules, a few days ago. The footnote stated that the author was unknown and to be honest they seem to be such common sense things that we should not need to list them. to some they may seem old fashioned. After reading them I realized that if we can actually apply these rules to both the simple and the complex things in our lives, we would probably get along much better with each other. And some of them really model love and biblical principles.

1. If you open it, close it. (including issues or problems to resolve)
2. If you turn it on, turn it off. (this goes for attitudes and behaviors too)
3. If you unlock it, lock it back up.
4. If you break it, admit it. (try applying this to trust, relationships, commitments and more..)
5. If you can't fix it, call someone who can. (especially when the only one who can help is God)
6. if you borrow it, return it.
7. If you value it, take care of it. (particularly critical for relationships, family, homes....)
8. If you make a mess, clean it up. (and messes come in many different forms)
9. If you move it, put it back.
10. If it belongs to someone else and you want to us it, get permission.
11. If you don't know how to operate it, leave it alone.
12. If it's none of your business, don't ask. (don't ask, but if it bothers you - do pray)
13. If it is not broken, do not fix it.
14. I fit will brighten someone's day, say it.
15. If it will tarnish someone's reputation, keep it to yourself.

Firsts

We celebrated my son's first birthday this past weekend and it was a bit hectic but so much fun! Rather than have a big bash for all of our friends we decided to have a small family party instead. Unfortunately our family does not live close by, but both sets of grandparents traveled to be here for his birthday! Our neighbor and her children (our one year old's only non-adult friends) came as well. Add one balloon, a small banner, plenty of treats, presents and smiled and it made for a wonderful time. Anything more would have been completely overwhelming to him.

As I watched him play with his first balloon (or in this case get scared by it), eat his first cupcake (apple muffin with whipped cream cheese) and tear the paper of his first presents I reflected on how many first he has had this year! First laugh, first word, first tooth, first food, first step, first ER trip, first Christmas...the list goes on.

I think one of my favorite aspects to motherhood is watching my kids experience so many 'firsts.' Seeing their excitement, wonder, surprise, joy and sometimes even trepidation over new things is amazing! My son is my second child, but all his firsts are so different from my older daughter's. They are really firsts for me too!

Surrounded by family, scattered conversation and laughing kids I was reminded of how much I have to be thankful for, and of how many firsts I have had in my own life...and will continue to have. Will I be able to trust God with all of these firsts and look to Him for direction? Like my children look at me for reassurance during so many of their firsts. I don't think we ever stop having 'firsts' in our lives, especially as we grow towards becoming the person God has created us to be. I am glad that our Heavenly Father is here to experience all of our firsts, the joyful and the tearful, with us!

Worth the Effort

All moms have demanding lives. It doesn't matter if you are a stay-at-home mom to one or a working mom of five; we are all busy. In-between housework, errands, mealtimes, cooking, jobs, and caring for our families, sometimes friendships get pushed to the back burner. I talk to my husband about everything going on in my life, and he is a wonderful listener and gives great advice. But it's not always the same as talking to a girlfriend. It can be easy to build up acquantainces but still have no friends. Being part of a church, I have relationships with so many people! We talk and mingle after Sunday service, but most of those conversations are superficial. It's hard to get into a real talk with someone in 10 minutes in a crowded church foyer. I've realized that friendships require work - they require time and attention to grow. They also require making yourself vulnerable: which can be very difficult for all of us that want to be perfect.

I'm sharing this because I was recently reminded of how wonderful it is to have Christian girlfriends. Last month I had a really difficult experience that I wasn't sure how to process. Emotionally, I was all over the place. My husband was so supportive and loving, but he handled the experience very differently than I did. I didn't want to talk to anybody else about it, but then God and my husband were both gently saying to me that I should. About a week later, I was able to share my experience with some girlfriends. They listened, they validated my feelings (all of them!), and they gave me godly advice. I even found out that two friends had been through the same thing, and the understanding they had was so helpful. I had been carrying this secret burden around for a week, and through sharing it with close friends, crying with them, and being supported by them, I was able to feel more at peace. I am so thankful to God for placing these women in my life who I can have that kind of relationship with.

What about you? Have you put friendships on the back burner? Maybe it's time to put a little work into building up those relationships. The rewards are worth the effort!

Being Like Martha

For as long as I can remember, I have always heard Pastors and Sunday School Teachers infer that being like Mary was more desirable than being like Martha. Do you remember the bible story in Luke 10:38 -42? Two sisters, Martha and Mary are dear friends of Jesus and so when he passes through their village on his way to Jerusalem, he stops at their home for dinner. They are happy to have Jesus there and the story tells that Martha is preparing dinner for them. Verse 40 also says that Martha was "distracted by the big dinner she was preparing." (New Living Translation)
Ok, so she was distracted, but I have always wanted to say to the one teaching the message, "she may have been distracted, but have you thought about the fact that she did not have the luxury of going to the grocery store to buy all the ingredients or bring home a prepared meal for a last minute guest? She had to prepare everything from scratch. What if Mary was not handy in the kitchen and so Martha had to prepare it all herself? What if her gift of love was to serve others and she wanted to have everything just so, for those who she loved?" I get Martha. I have been there and still find myself being a Martha when it comes to loving my family and friends by preparing special meals and gifts for them.
Jesus tells Martha, 'my dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details. There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.' This is the hardest thing for someone like (me) Martha to hear. We thrive on being busy and serving. So how do we respond to such a moment? As you, I want to be teachable. I want to apply this truth to my own life, but how do we do this if we don't "do", who will?
I have been thinking about this for a long time and I thought that it had to do with balance, but I found out that the definition of balance is not what I thought it was. I thought it meant to do a little bit of everything, you know, the Ecclesiastes motto - there is a season for everything. I would work and rework my schedule until I had it so that the moment the rice would be done, I could tell everyone to come to the table. I went overboard right? I scheduled my first child, deciding when he would be sleeping, eating, and awake when he was a baby, but found out early that until I learned his bent, having him sleep one hour when he needed a two hour nap defeated the purpose of my schedule. I did two loads of laundry a day, but fell into a rut when sometimes it would just pile up and I had to do four and yet did not have the time. You see what I am getting at is that my concept of balance was all about me, not the people I was serving.
Back to my definition of balance, Random House defines balance as a state of stability. All the order and discipline in the world is worthless without this kind of balance. My balance, my stability comes from Jesus. When all is said and done, I want my husband and children to have been fed of course, but most importantly, I want them to have been loved. Without bathing every part of my day in prayer, and releasing the anxious uncontrollable parts to my Lord, I go into control mode. Don't we all? We think that if we have a schedule full of order, everything else will fall into place. This can go on for years until we hit a wall. It may be that our spouse feels neglected, one of our children lacks self confidence, or we just feel unsatisfied because we have not stopped long enough to see that our concept of "just so" is not good enough.
God knows what is good enough for each of us. The only way to know His will is to commit our lives, our marriages, homes, children, work, and friendships to Him daily.
This week my home needs a cleaning crew and it is easy for me to have a meltdown. Instead of opting for that, I am going to give it up to God. It is a given that we need to be good planners when it comes to our family's life, but perhaps you'll agree with me that everyone will be happier if they are from a balanced home, full of love and stability. Trust me, the dust bunnies will still be there tomorrow.

Today...

After 38 weeks, baby Morgan has arrived! She's so tiny (6 lbs. 3 oz and 18 in. long) and so cute, she gives me the butterflies every time I hold her. The only thing is, I don't get to hold her much since she remains in the NICU. But hopefully, things will get better and she'll come home to us soon.

Today, I spent 14 hours in the NICU, watching the nurses and the doctors at work. I also met many mothers, just exhausted and heart broken as they watch their tiny babies through the thick glass window. Some of them have been in the NICU for 2 to 3 months but weigh barely 3 lbs. Others can barely breathe on their own. Morgan, on the other hand is healthy and normal. They're keeping her there for preventative reasons, unlike most of the babies there.

But it's still hard to leave the hospital at the end of the day knowing she has to stay there. I can't imagine what it would be like for the moms going in and out of the NICU for 3 months and not being able to hold them in their arms and bond with them. But I must trust God and praise Him because Morgan is His daughter first and He loves her so much more than I ever can. Please keep us in your prayers, and I will give you an update next week.

Don't Ask Unless You WANT the Answer

I had a brief conversation with my 2 year old recently, that taught me a few things. It unfolded as follows:

"Do you need a tissue?" I asked.

"No," she replied.

"Are you sure?" I asked again, "Your nose is running."

"I said NO," she stated sternly. "NO means NO!"

Then she gave me a look that seems to simultaneously scold me and declare me funny, as she walked out of the room.

Wow! I guess she told me! I was trying to keep from laughing out loud at our little exchange, but realized that I had completely set myself up for that.

After all, what had I expected her to say when I asked if she needed a tissue? She was busy playing and in a two year old's world a running nose is hardly a concern. What I had actually meant was - 'You need a tissue.' Lesson learned, don't ask unless I am actually giving her a choice and going to act based upon her answer. If that is not the case, then don't ask - just tell. Next time I will just say, 'Time to wipe your nose,' or 'Here is a tissue for you.' The same way I say, 'Time for bed,' not 'Do you want to go to bed now?'

Her response after I asked a second time, taught me something else though. She is actually listening to what her father and I say, as it was a direct quote from Daddy. She even mimicked his tone and inflections. And the fact that she thought it was silly that I had asked again after she said no, made me realize that she has a very good understanding of what no means! If we say NO she knows we mean it and usually does not ask again!

As much as I laughed at our funny little conversation, it also made me think honestly about how many times I ask questions of others when I am not really ready to listen. Worse yet, I have asked God a question when I am not prepared to truly listen and act based upon His answer. In reality, though it is phrased as a question, I am not asking.... I am trying to tell God what I think He should do. Talk about needed a reality check! Have you ever done that??

I love that God is so creative and gracious that He can use a humorous conversation with my daughter to show me where I have erred in speaking to Him. I will definitely take care now to prepare my ears to listen, my heart to respond and myself to act before asking.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

The ABC's of Character Building: E is for Enthusiastic

And whatsoever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father by him. – Colossians 3:17
When mothers dream about instilling character qualities in their children, enthusiasm is probably not top on their list. But pay attention to this one, as it's your antidote to the dreaded words, “I’m bored!” It can also be your child’s key to discovering his or her deepest loves and unique talents.

My own parents were great at cultivating enthusiasm. Mom describes it quite simply: “We just watched what you kids were interested in. As soon as one of you showed the least bit of interest in anything, we gave you books, we took you to activities, and we did whatever we could to fuel that interest.”
With this approach, my siblings and I sampled varied subjects at a young age. Because we selected activities that naturally suited us, we had a strong innate interest in these pursuits, stayed engaged and devoted more energy to mastering them. It’s no coincidence that we each went on to achieve excellence in careers related to these key childhood interests. Research has tied people’s high performance in a given field to favorite childhood hobbies or pastimes.

So how does this translate into godly character development for our kids? As we encourage children to pursue their enthusiasms, we put into motion the truth found in Ephesians 2:10: “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Singer John Fischer expressed it this way

“To each of us is given a purpose for living,
To play our own part in His plan from the start.
Each to show His beauty, and His creativity,
The part of His name no one else could proclaim.”

True fulfillment comes from using the gifts God has given us, for His glory.
Giving our children opportunities to explore what fascinates and motivates them, helps them discover their unique gifts. Are you ready for this rewarding task, Moms? You can get started today! Here are some more “E” words to help you develop your children’s capacity for Enthusiasm.

1. EXPOSE your kids to a little bit of everything. Continually add some random input into their lives. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or expensive. Take neighborhood field trips, try free park programs, or stage special activities at home. Even watching TV together can lead to “Aha!” moments. Just remember to be fully present whenever you do things with your children. Catch them being intrigued!
2. ENLIST friends and relatives. Fred Rogers (a.k.a. Mister Rogers) used to challenge adults to think back and remember someone who had made a great difference in their lives as a child. Very often, that person was a kindly uncle or neighbor who taught them a hobby, such as fishing or cooking. Who do you know who might play the same role in your child’s life?
3. EQUIP your children’s fired-up imaginations. Once you notice that their interest is sparked, supply a library book or start a beginner-level project to keep it going. Attend a local event or a museum exhibit. If interest continues to grow, watch and listen for clues about which steps to take next.
4. ENGAGE in organized activity. When it becomes apparent that your child is drawn to a subject, find a group or class that fits his or her age and skill level. Whether it’s soccer or Scrabble, boating or bird-watching, there are probably some opportunities nearby.
5. EMBRACE a bit of chaos! If your child’s thing is music, there will be noise. If it’s sports, there will be sweaty uniforms. If it’s building models, there will be Lego blocks clogging your vacuum hose even after he’s enrolled in architecture school. (I can attest to this personally!) So keep your expectations realistic, tolerate some extra housekeeping, and try to remember this solemn truth: the irritating messes will one day be iridescent memories. (Again, some firsthand testimony here.)
6. ENCOURAGE whole-heartedly your children’s forays into self-discovery – that‘s what this whole “enthusiasm” thing is about. Always be a cheerleader. Sarcastic or critical comments can easily quench an adventuresome spirit. Our words and our reactions carry immense impact and power. Let’s keep tender hearts towards the tender hearts in our care. Let’s believe in our children’s innate abilities, placed there by God Himself, and be thoughtful stewards of their development. We can do this most effectively when we ourselves are in constant communion with the Encourager of our own lives.
   

Enthusiasm is the toy box of Hope. We have the privilege of helping our small children discover their most treasured activities and connect them to their unique inner talents. These connections will become the building blocks for a positive outlook all through life. Let’s keep our own enthusiasm for motherhood high, through an authentic daily walk with Christ. Then He will show each of us personally how we can draw out our children’s enthusiasms and prepare them for a life of fulfillment.

Taco Pizza and Extra Recipe

I was inspired by a ground beef taco pizza recipe in my church cookbook to use leftover pizza dough and enchilada filling to make a "pizza". The recipe I based it on is called, "Weeknight Taco Pizza for Hungry Guys" and it is sure to satisfy all those hungry hubbies (and sons) out there!

Ingredients

Leftover Pizza dough from Monday night

1/2 cup crushed corn chips

Leftover enchilada filling from Wednesday night
1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

1/2 head iceberg lettuce, shredded (leftover from Wednesday night)

1) Preheat oven to 375. On a lightly floured surface, knead the corn chips into the pizza dough. Roll it out so that it will fit in a well-greased 10" pie pan. Form a rim around the edge.

2) Reheat the enchilada filling in the microwave so that it is warm. Then spread it evenly over the dough, leaving a crust around the edge.

3) Bake between 20-30 minutes (start checking at 15 min, just in case). You are looking for the edge to be light golden brown and crisp. After removing from the oven, immediately sprinkle with cheese and lettuce.

Extra Fun Recipe: Nigella Lawson's Cocktail Sausages

These are so easy to make and they are a HUGE crowd pleaser! It's also a good way to use that rarely called-for sesame oil that you have in your pantry from the gyoza recipe!

Ingredients

2 1/4 lbs cocktail sausage links

2 Tbls. sesame oil

1/2 cup honey

2 Tbls. soy sauce

1) Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Separate the sausages if they are linked and arrange them in a large, shallow-sided roasting tin.

2) Whisk together the oil, honey and soy sauce and pour over the sausages. Mix well.

3) Bake for 15 minutes, stir, then bake another 10-15 minutes. Enjoy!

No More PB&J Please!

One of the coolest website I came around to is www.ilunchbox.com . When it comes to packing my children lunch, I become so limited. Somehow, I lose my creativity and can barely get myself out of the PB&J mode. If I'm lucky, I can sometimes get into PB&J + banana mode.

However, this website has become quite a pal now. It makes a busy mom's life a little easier. They provide healthy and simple lunch recipes for your children. I use it for my eager toddler (who wants to be like her older siblings with her Hello Kitty lunch box), and she likes it a lot too.

So, to spice up your kids' lunch box, try ilunchbox.com :)

Gyoza (Dumplings), Teriyaki Chicken, Rice&Broccoli

My Dad is Japanese, so I grew up eating more rice, seaweed, noodles, and dumplings than most American families. Here is an amazing dumpling recipe from my Mom that I love. She always used ground beef or pork, but I tried it recently with (cheaper and healthier) ground chicken and really loved it. It's a little involved, but totally worth it. The rest of the meal is super easy.

Ingredients

1 lb. ground chicken

1 cup minced cabbage

1/4 - 1 tsp. grated ginger powder (depending on how much you like ginger, I only added a pinch)

2 tsp. minced garlic

1/2 cup minced scallions

2 Tbls. soy sauce

3 tsp. sesame oil

Approx. 40 wonton or gyoza wrappers

A few Tbls. vegetable oil

1 lb. chicken tenders

Teriyaki marinade of choice

1 cup uncooked rice

2 cups frozen broccoli

1) Blend chicken, cabbage, ginger powder, minced garlic, minced scallions, soy sauce, and sesame oil in a bowl and mix well.

2) Place a rounded teaspoon of filling in the center of each wrapper. Moisten edges of wrapper with water (your pinky works well), fold one side over filling and press edges together to make a half-moon shape (or a triangle if you're using wonton wrappers). Pleat edges decoratively, if you wish.

3) Heat about 1-1 1/2 Tbls. oil in a heavy skillet over medium-high heat. Add a single layer of gyoza. Cook, uncovered, a few minutes until bottoms are deep golden-brown. Add about 1/3 cup water and immediately cover skillet tightly. Steam until skins are translucent. Uncover and cook a little more until water evaporates. Repeat with remaining gyoza. For a detailed photo tutorial on wrapping and cooking gyoza, go here. You can serve them with some soy sauce for dipping.

4) Marinade chicken in teriyaki sauce about 30 minutes, covered in the fridge. While that is marinading, cook rice according to package directions and steam/microwave/simmer broccoli according to package directions.

5) When chicken is done marinating, just pan fry it in a little oil about 4-5 minutes per side.

Something to Think About.....

Finally (sisters) whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about these things. ~ Phillipians 4:8

What is on your mind today? What do you find yourself thinking about? Are you dwelling on an offense or worrying about the future?

There are so many things surrounding us, so many people and events that capture our attention.

This verse has challenged me today. So what is true? What is right and pure? My first thought was...Jesus. Am I thinking about Him, His love, His work, the fruits of His spirit? Not often enough. I have been praying throughout the day for God to quiet my mind and direct my thoughts away from the lies, wrongs, ugliness and unworthiness that can easily fill it up.

I find that the more I think about what is admirable, right, excellent and praiseworthy....the more I forget the things that do not have these attributes.

So what will you think about today?

Chicken Enchiladas and Salad

This recipe is open to many interpretations: you can season the enchilada filling however you want! I am writing down the spices that I used, but have fun with it.

Ingredients

Leftover shredded chicken from chicken soup day

1 cup cooked rice

1 can black beans, drained and rinsed

3/4 can kernel corn, drained

Spices of choice: I used chili powder, cumin, onion salt, garlic powder, paprika, pepper

6 large flour tortillas

1 jar salsa

1 small container sour cream

About 2 cups shredded cheddar cheese

1/2 head iceberg lettuce, cut for salad

Vegetables of choice for salad

Salad dressing of choice

1) Preheat oven to 375. Put chicken in a large, microwave-safe bowl and reheat for 1-2 minutes on high to take the chill off. Mix in rice, beans, and corn, and the spices that you are using. Do a lot of tasting to check if you want to add more of certain spices. Please note that you are only using half of the filling for this dinner. The rest will be put in the taco pizza dinner Friday.

2) Very lightly grease a 9x13" pan. Take a tortilla, put a large spoonful of salsa in the middle and top with a generous amount of chicken filling. Sprinkle in some cheese and wrap both sides towards the middle. Lay seam side down in the baking dish. Repeat with other 5 tortillas.

3) Top with the remainder of the salsa and cheese. Bake in the oven about 15 minutes, until cheese gets all melty and they are heated through.

4) Toss lettuce, vegetables and dressing together and serve salad on the side with the enchiladas.

Pot Roast, Baked Potatoes, and Bacon Green Beans

I got this recipe for pot roast from a lovely woman at my church, and the green bean recipe from another good friend -- I'm just passing along the goodness! This meal is SO easy, but the ultimate comfort food. The pot roast does cook for a long time (5 hours) but it's all hands-off, and it needs all that time because when it's done it is so tender that you can cut it with a fork. (Is your mouth watering yet?)

Ingredients

1 (4-6 lb.) cut of meat for pot roast (like bottom round)

1 can Campbell’s condensed golden mushroom soup

1 packet Lipton onion soup mix

A few Tbls flour

Russet potatoes (one for each person eating)

2 cups frozen green beans

Approx. 8 strips of bacon, chopped

Light brown sugar (1/4-1/2 cup)

Red Wine Vinegar (a few Tablespoons)

1) Preheat oven to 350. Lay out a few sheets of heavy-duty aluminum foil on top of each other on a baking sheet (you will wrap the pot roast inside the foil). Mix can of soup (do NOT add water) and packet of soup mix together in the middle of the foil. Place the pot roast on top and coat it all over with the soup mixture. Sprinkled with a few Tablespoons of flour. Wrap it tightly in the foil, then place the baking sheet in the oven and cook for 5 hours.

2) Come back about 45minutes before the pot roast is ready and microwave the potatoes. The time varies for how many potatoes you are using. Instructions on microwaving potatoes can be found here.

3) Cook the green beans according to package directions (I usually simmer on stovetop or microwave). In a separate large saute pan, fry the bacon until crisp. Transfer to a paper-towel lined plate. Leave about 1 Tbls of bacon fat in the pan, set the rest aside.

4) Lower the heat, then add 2 Tbls. red wine vinegar and about 1/4 cup of light brown sugar. Stir well and taste - if too tart, add some more bacon fat or sugar. Pour onto the green beans and toss to coat evenly.

5) Serve each person a baked potato, some slices of pot roast, green beans and gravy (inside the bottom of the foil a gravy forms out of the soup mixes and juices from the pot roast). MMmmm!

Out of Focus

Yesterday I had one of those days that seemed like a comedy of errors, except that by the end of the day nothing seemed that funny to me and I went to bed feeling like a failure.
The past week or so has been trying. Between the kids' sickness, injury and other stresses I had not had a decent night sleep in a long time. When I woke up that morning I already felt worn down, but I pushed myself to get up. I rushed to get ready, get the kids ready and fed and out the door for a meeting. On the way out the door the baby threw up and my two year old decided to strip in order to facilitate her latest wardrobe change. Rather than be calm and patient I soon found myself barking at her like a drill sergeant...do this, do that, do it now....anything to get out the door.
Needless to say, I did not leave the house in a wonderful mood. But then I missed a perfect opportunity to quiet myself and re-start my day. I was in such a hurry in the morning that I did not pray, did not read the word, did not even take time to ask God to guide my steps. I could have done that during the car ride, but instead my mind was racing.I was so focused on wanting the meeting to go well, be productive and worth people's time that I forgot to focus on God.

After the meeting, which was not a mess but not as productive as I hoped (hard to concentrate with a crying baby) both my kids were tired and hungry - then we got stuck in traffic. There was an accident and we waited and waited until the road was cleared. Another great opportunity for me to shift my focus where it belonged, on God. And to pray for some much needed patience and strength. But instead I worried about the fact that I had left my very sick husband at home to fend for myself and that my kids (who were just getting well) were now missing lunch and would not get the rest they needed, knowing that since they slept a half and hour in the car- they would not nap later.

The rest of the day went from bad to worse, leaving me feeling like a complete failure as all my endeavors in the home and out of the home seemed to go awry. Not until before bed did I realize that my only true failure was my focus on myself. I was running around trying to do everything for everyone...but out of my own strength. It was my failure to start my day focused on God that was my downfall.

Sometimes I say I am too busy to read the word, pray or mediate on scripture......but that is not true. God provides so many opportunities to turn our eyes back to Him. Yesterday I missed them. I am thankful that He is gracious though and has given me this reminder.

Today I started my day by focusing on God, even though it was quick prayer and a couple scriptures, it was the right start. And I plan to start every day, every afternoon and every evening that way!!

Monday Night Meal

Chicken Soup with Onion&Garlic Focaccia

Soup

1 whole chicken, cut up

4 Tbl salt

4 cabbage leaves

2 leeks, washed, white & light green parts only

2 parsnips, washed & halved

4 stalks of celery, washed & cut to fit in pot

6 carrots, peeled & cut into 2" chunks

1/4-1/2 cup Alphabets pasta

1) If you have a very large stockpot, use it (I use two large pots b/c I don't have one pot big enough - and I divide all ingredients in half between both pots). If you are just using one pot, put chicken, salt, cabbage, leeks, parsnips, and celery into pot. If using two pots, put half of chicken pieces in one pot and half in the other, making sure you have one breast, one thigh, one wing, etc. in each pot. Then put 2Tbls salt, 2 cabbage leaves, 1 leek, 1 parsnip, 2 stalks of celery in each pot. Cover all ingredients with cold water.

2) Bring to a boil and let it go at a low boil or high simmer for 45 minutes.

3) Add in carrots (splitting between two pots if using two pots).

4) Cook another 30 minutes. Remove everything except carrots from the pot. Save the chicken, discard everything else. Add the pasta to the pot and cook as long as the package directs. As the pasta is cooking, separate half the chicken meat from the bones and cut up into bite-size pieces. Add back to the soup pot. Take the other half of the chicken meat, shred, and set aside for later use (enchiladas).

5) I like to serve this soup with a little pepper sprinkled on top!

Foccaccia

1 cup warm water (105-115 degrees)

1 T. sugar

1 pkg. (1/4 oz.) active dry yeast (2 1/4 t.)

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

1 cup cake flour

1 T. kosher salt

2 T. olive oil

1 small onion, half finely chopped, half cut into thin slices

1 clove garlic, finely minced

Olive oil

Pinch of pepper

1 tsp dried basil

1 tsp dried parsley

1) Combine water, sugar and yeast, mix lightly and proof until foamy, about 5 minutes.

2) Mix flours and salt in the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with a dough hook. Make a well. Add oil to the yeast mixture once it has proofed, then pour into well of flour mixture.

3) Knead on low speed 10 minutes (if kneading by hand, knead same amount of time).

4) Place dough in a lightly oiled bowl, turning to coat. Cover with plastic wrap and let rise in a warm place until doubled, about 2 hours.

5) Punch down dough and divide into two balls, pinching the bottoms closed. Place on a baking sheet covered with parchment paper. Cover with plastic wrap and let rise in a warm place another hour.

6) Saute chopped onion in a little olive oil for 2 minutes. Add the garlic, saute another minute. Let this cool. In the same pan, add a little more olive oil and saute sliced onion about 5 minutes. Set aside.

6) After dough is finished rising, wrap one ball tightly in plastic wrap and save in refrigerator (for pizza later in the week).

7) Flour a working surface and knead in chopped onion/garlic mixture, pepper, basil, and parsley into the other ball of dough. Roll out the dough until it's around the size of a baking sheet. Place on a lightly oiled baking sheet.

8) Bake in a 450 degree oven for about 15 minutes (start checking at 10 minutes) until light golden around edges. Cut into strips and serve with soup.

Meal Planning...Back Again!

I'm finally doing another week of meals! I'm sorry we haven't posted meal plans in so long, but I'm back from the hiatus and pumped to post some great dinners for this week. I have some good comfort food for you this week, which is nice if your weather has been anything like ours (fluctuating between cold and more cold). If you've never made homemade chicken soup or pot roast, this is the time to start, because I have easy, foolproof recipes for you, both from friends. Another first to try is making gyoza (dumplings) - these are a little more involved, but so worth it because they are so delicious. I'll start with the menu and then the shopping list will be below that.

Monday: Chicken Soup with Garlic & Onion Foccaccia
Tuesday: Pot Roast with Baked Potatoes and Bacon String Beans
Wednesday: Chicken Enchiladas and Salad
Thursday: Gyoza (Japanese dumplings), Teriyaki Chicken with Rice and Broccoli
Friday: Taco Pizza
Extra Fun Recipe: Nigella Lawson's Cocktail Sausages

Shopping List
Produce
1 small head cabbage
2 leeks
2 parsnips
4 stalks of celery
6 large carrots
1 small onion
3 cloves garlic
1 head iceberg lettuce
Any vegetables for salad that you prefer
Large russet potatoes (1 for each person eating)
½ cup minced scallions

Pantry
1 can black beans
1 can kernel corn
1 jar salsa
1 can Campbell’s condensed golden mushroom soup
1 packet Lipton onion soup mix
Preferred salad dressing
Red Wine Vinegar (a few Tablespoons)
4 T. olive oil
Vegetable oil (about 3 Tbls.)
3 tsp. sesame oil (If you cannot find this in your supermarket, any specialty Asian food store will carry it).
½ cup soy sauce
1 ½ cups teriyaki marinade of choice

Seasonings and Baking
Enchilada seasonings of choice (ex: chili powder, cumin, onion salt, garlic powder, pepper, paprika)
Salt and Pepper
1 t. dried basil
1 t. dried parsley
Grated ginger powder (with spices, 1/4-1 tsp.)
1 pkg. (1/4 oz.) active dry yeast (2 ¼ t.)
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup cake flour
1 T. sugar
Light brown sugar (1/4-1/2 cup)

Meat
1 (approx 5 lb) chicken, cut up (You can purchase it packaged or buy a whole chicken and cut it up yourself at home)
1 (4-6 lb.) cut of meat for pot roast (like bottom round)
Approx. 8 strips of bacon
1 lb. ground chicken
1 lb. chicken tenders

Pasta
2 cups rice (uncooked)
¼-1/2 cup alphabets pasta (or other small pasta for soup)

Dairy
1 small container sour cream
4 cups shredded cheddar cheese

Snack Foods
Corn chips (like Tostitos) - small bag

Frozen
2 cups frozen green beans
2 cups frozen broccoli

Goods
Aluminum foil -heavy-duty is preferable– (pot roast bakes in foil)

Specialty
Wonton wrappers (about 40)
6 large flour tortillas

Optional Ingredients for Extra Cocktail Sausage Recipe:
2 ¼ lb. cocktail sausage links
2 Tbls. sesame oil
½ cup honey
2 Tbls. soy sauce

Can Opposites Attract?

Bishop T.D. Jakes, pastor of the The Potter's House in Texas says of his wife Serita, "occasionally she saw ahead, often I felt her behind me, but through it all, she was beside me." Ladies, are we willing to stand beside our husbands through all the seasons of life? Where do you spend your time standing in your marriage?

Are you married to your opposite? You can love the same music, same foods, and same type of furniture and art, but stay married for a few years, and you will see that you are more different than you thought. This does not have to be a problem unless we choose to view this as a dilemma instead of an opportunity to love our spouses more deeply.

My husband and I have formed similar lifestyle habits and share the same core values, but our personalities are as different as night from day. There have been times in the past when we viewed the same circumstance in raising our kids so differently that it has been divisive. Those are the moments we need to be careful of ladies.

Stephen and Alex Kendrick write in The Love Dare book that when we are frustrated, hurt or disappointed with unmet expectations, we begin to line our hearts and minds with our spouse's weaknesses and failures. Their bad habits, hurtful words and poor decisions over power our own failures when we have been hurt. What may start out as a moment if kept here long enough, can be the seeds to killing marriages. The more time you spend here, the more your heart devalues your spouse.

Be careful and remember that love chooses to believe the best about people. When disappointment happens, make every effort to deal with it appropriately. Focus on the positive attributes of your husband which attracted you to him in the first place. This next statement will not always be easy to say, but work on prayerfully saying in your prayers, "my husband completes me." His character qualities are not mine - and that is good. Philippians 4:8 tells me to meditate on anything that is praiseworthy. 1 Corinthians 13 tells me that love believes all things and hopes all things.

I have a great prayer that I pray for my husband regularly that is lamenated into a bookmark that is in the current book I am reading. (Family Life Publishing)

Lord, I lift my husband to You today and pray, according

to Your Word, that You give him strength to lead,

time to know his family, and a passion to manage his home.

Bless his work and show him daily how to honor You in his attitude

and spirit; confirm the work of his hands unto Your purpose.

Enable him to be a wise steward of our finances and all

we possess, remembering that all things are Yours and entrusted

to us for Your purposes.

I pray God that he will love You with all his heart, soul, mind

and strength and hate evil.

May he be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger.

Protect him physically, mentally and spiritually.

Give him the desire to teach and model a godly lifestyle for his children.

Instruct him and teach him in the way he should go; give him peace

in the circumstances and integrity in decisions he must face today.

May he meditate day and night on Your Word, pray without ceasing,

and stay faithful to Christ to the end.

May he develop strong relationships with other godly men,

and make me my husband's helpmate, companion, champion,

friend and support.

I lay all my expectations at Your cross.

Teach me how to pray for my husband and make my prayers

a true language of love.

Amen.

How about some veggies?

One of my biggest challenge as a mother has always been getting my girls to eat those dreaded vegetables. As babies, they were okay with the pureed ones, but as soon as they turned one, there was no way to get them to have a balanced meal. Until yesterday.....

I decided to to use the trick of getting the kids involved in making the meal. We made a quick and easy rainbow salad. I had my 7 yr. old wash the vegetables first. She was so excited to be able to take on a chore that would boost her self-esteem. Then I had all three kids cut the washed veggies. I couldn't exactly give them a real knife to do this, so I gave them our butter knives and "easier to cut" veggies such as bell peppers, cucumbers, and tomatoes. So, it was safe enough for my eager 2 1/2 yr. old to be a part of this as well. By the end of dinner, I got all three of my kids to eat celery, radish, carrots, cucumbers, etc. It was a success! And the best part was they had so much fun preparing this meal together. I wish I had remembered to take some pictures but as always, I'm so forgetful with the camera. But here's the recipe.

Little M's Rainbow Salad

Ingredients

Veggies: Chopped to bite-sized cucumbers, tomatoes, radish, carrots, red and yellow bell peppers, celery, and mozzarella cheese.

Prepared balsamic vinaigrette- just enough to coat all the veggies.

Little bit of grated parmesan cheese.

Put everything in a large bowl and mix!

Tuesday Tips

We love sharing tips with each other as moms. If something has helped us or made our life a little bit easier, we like to pass it along.

Well today we are passing along a few tips gleaned from some mothers and grandmothers here and there. It is a hodgepodge of tips that I thought were useful. They may be new to you or something tried and true that your have forgotten. Enjoy, hope you find one that you can use.

Tip of the Day:
*Be sure to moisturize your hands before your face, or your baby's body! Did you know that your hands are often the driest part of your body. So before you use them to spread on that expensive face moisturizer or soft-smelling baby lotion, lotion them up first. If you don't you will use much more face or baby lotion, as it will continue to soak into your hands rather than into your face or your baby.

Plan Ahead For Mom:
*Stash a bag in the car with snacks, a water bottle, books, stickers and paper& crayons, or small toys (saves time knowing it is already in the car and helps in a pinch when stuck in traffic or anywhere else).

*If you have a baby keep the bare essentials (diaper,wipes, pacifier/bottle, change of clothes) in a small gift bag in your car, quick easy access. This is an 'extra' essentials set in case you forget to bring something you need or are running out quickly and shouldn't need anything.

*Keep a mini 'glam' purse in your car - cute earrings/jewelry, fancy headband, extra lip gloss, gum, body spritz a comb and any other little thing to help you freshen up and beautify on the run.

Cleaning and such:
*Avoid sticky gooey laundry detergent bottles by keeping a cap from an empty detergent bottle. Use the empty cap to measure the detergent and then toss right into the load to clean. The extra cap is also great for soaking a small stain or spot on clothing. Just put you detergent or stain remover in the bottom of the cap, add a little water and scrunch the stained part of the clothing into the cap as well.

*Disinfect stuffed animals or cloth toys that cannot be washed & dried by freezing them. Spot or surface wash according to instructions, then spray with a light mist of disinfectant spray and toss in a Ziploc bag. Place the bag in your freezer overnight (for about 12 hrs). Freezing will kill the majority of any bacteria, viruses and dust mites lurking inside. Bang and shake out the toy or animals to rid it of dust and particles before giving it back to your child.

*Run your family's toothbrushes through the dishwasher every week to kill germs.

Sick Kids:
*Keep an empty tissue box next to the full one, or next to your child. Makes a quick and convenient trash for kids to throw away used tissues and avoids kids leaving them laying around or dropping them on the way to the garbage.

*Before bed, fill the medicine dropper with the proper dose of pain reliever, cough medicine or whatever your child might need should they wake in the middle of the night. Then place it on a wipe or paper towel out of reach in their room or wherever it is easy for you to get. Makes giving medicine a lot quicker and neater too.

*Keep two 'sick' buckets or bins for night time. Keep one empty, to place near your child. Fill the other with an extra set of pajamas, bedsheets/blanket, large plastic bag and a roll of paper towels or package of baby wipes. Makes it easy to grab what you need for a quick clean up and bring it to the child's room, bathroom or other room as needed. Then, once emptied, you also have a second clean bucket on hand.

*Keep medicines up high in the fridge. Chilled medicine usually feels better on the throat and the cold dulls the taste too. It also keeps them out of children's reach. A well known, but great tip!

No Such Thing as a Perfect Mom: Confessions of a Recovering Perfectionist

Before I had children, and after, I admit that I observed other mothers, kids and families and made a mental list in my head. It started something like this: My kids will never.........

...sleep in my bed
...still use a pacifier when they are 3
...watch TV all day
...fall asleep to the TV
...eat candy/cookies/fast food
...leave the house in mismatched clothing or looking dishevelled
...be allowed to stay up as late as they want
...be out of control in public
...demand toys/food in the store and get it

You get the idea. They were all things that made me cringe when I saw, or heard about, other kids doing them. Though most of these things really had more impact on my perceived image of being a perfect mom....than a lasting impact on the life and character of the child.

After becoming a parent I realized that many of my preconceived ideas about what my kids will do, and what I will do, get thrown out the window. I have learned that teaching my kids to be healthy and safe, helping them learn and develop godly character and enjoying fun times with them now is much more important than sticking to a list of 'DO' and 'DO NOT.'

Don't get me wrong, I do not have a laid back approach to parenting. Those who know me can attest to the fact that I love schedules, order, control and a clean playroom. I am a perfectionist at heart.... or at least I try to be. But I now know that no one is, or can be, perfect. No one that is, except for THE ONE. The one who showed us His perfect love....Jesus Christ. And since God has entrusted my children to me, the least that I can do is trust Him that in my weakness He will be strong. Only in realizing my imperfection can I get to the place where I am relying completely on Him.

I am not a perfect mom, and I know it. Why then do I sometimes review the mental list in my head, checking off things to see how well I am doing?
*My kids don't eat exclusively organic food, but they eat very healthy food without added sugar. They don't eat cookies, candy or fast food (except for an occasion pizza or sub ordered out)--- no junk food, check!!
*My kids only watch one short DVD or video a day (except when we are sick)--- Don't watch too much TV, check!
*My kids sleep fall asleep by themselves in their own beds every night----Good sleep habits, check!!

Perhaps focusing on these minor things, makes me feel like I have the majors covered also. Does anyone else do that?

Recently I have begun allowing my 2 1/2 year old daughter to lay on our bed and watch a DVD during her rest time. It is the only way she will actually fall asleep when she really needs a nap. Some days she really needs to sleep and when she doesn't she melts down. After a few days like that she has a tendency to get sick. So I have allowed her to fall asleep watching a show on our bed. It is not every day and rest time will be phased out soon. She still sleeps in her own bed at night. I am not training her to need the TV to sleep. It won't have a lasting negative impact on her. Then why am I so hesitant to let her continue this method of napping, even though it provides much needed sleep for her.

The only reason is because it is not something that a perfect mom would do. I guess it is a good thing that I am not a perfect mom then. Good thing I am an imperfect mom who does her best, but in her weakness relies on God for His perfection.