Sleep Tight

Have you had the experience of being woken from a sound sleep by a child's scream? I am sure many of you have and will agree that it is far from pleasant. That has been my reality for the last several nights. I wake to the screams of my 2 year old and my heart pounds as I jump out of bed and run into her room in one fluid motion. Hoping that if I get there quick enough I can some how stop it as soon as it started. Unfortunately that is not the case.

Her screams and cries to not lesson when I appear. She does not quiet when I try to hold her and she does not really even truly awaken as she thrashes about. Some call it 'night terrors' or perhaps it is the combination of a bad dream and ear pain. I don't know why it happens. And as a mother it is heartbreaking to see her so upset and not be able find the cause. Worse yet, I cannot seem to do much to help.

We usually end up just waiting out her loud cries...20 minutes.... a half an hour.... and then finally she starts to talk to us through her cries. She always starts with "I need..." I need Momma, I need Daddy, I need Pooh bear, I need my blanket, I need my book, I need my doggie..... and so on. It is often hard to understand what she says through the sobs and we try our best to reassure her that we are there and that she already has what she needs. That she is in bed with her blanket and lovies surrounding her. That Mommy and Daddy are there. We pray for her and hug her. But it does not seem to matter. Either her doggie is in the wrong place on her bed, her pooh bear is on top of her blanket and she wants him under the blanket or we are standing and she wants us to sit by her bed. It is almost as if she is so upset that she cannot see the reality that she is safe in her bed, with everything she needs. As a mother it hurts that I am there to comfort her to do anything for her... but she is too upset to let me.

It makes me wonder, is this how God feels when we cry in our distress, "I need... I need." If only we can calm ourselves enough to listen and see. Would we notice that we are safe in His hand and that he has blessed us with the life, breath and everything else we need for the day.

Eventually my daughter's sobs and 'I needs' begin to quiet and she lays still, allowing me to rub her head. What seems like hours later (and often has actually been an hour) she is breathing deeply, finally alseep. I stand up from my uncomfortable position bent over the bed and make no sound as I creep out of her room. But somehow she senses that I have moved away from her anyway. "Momma," she says quietly. "Shhhhh," I say. "Goodnight, I love you," and make a quick retreat into my own bedroom. She falls back asleep as I fall back into my bed, exhausted and hoping that somehow it will be better tomorrow night.